Spread your wings and fly...

Anyone who knows me as a mother knows that I am extremely protective of my children. They are hardly ever away from me except for the occasional overnight stay with the grandparents and of course school and social activities like football, marital arts or dance classes, otherwise it’s me and them (or their dad of course). Not quite sure how I became this kind of mom but I guess I just want to protect them from all the craziness of the world and be there when they need me being the “best mom” I can be (whatever that is). Anyway when thinking back about my own childhood I’ve realized that my son who recently turned 10 (just this past Monday actually) doesn’t do half of the things I did at his age. He is chauffeured to and from school and any other activity and usually relies on me for almost anything he needs. By age 10 I was getting myself up, dressed, feed before school, and to school, I was practically handling my business, but my son is so much different. I wonder if sometimes I’m playing him too close..not allowing him the independence that he’s due. Can overprotection sometimes be a hindrance? So yesterday we’re hanging out together after dinner and the kids and I start talking about snacks we had a taste for. Out of nowhere I say hey why don’t you go to the store and pick up some things for us (did I just say that..that was really just a joke..really). He jumped at the chance..”sure Mom, I can do it, let me go”. After debating back and forth about whether or not he had to take his younger sister (she’ll be 6 in July) their dad and I decided to let them go. They would only have to cross three streets to get there (even though in my mind it seemed like miles) and we’ve been over the “look both ways first before crossing the street” talk a million times. Ok this was a huge step for them and me.. So we discuss what to get, how much money he should spend, to hold his sister’s hand when crossing the street, not to talk to strangers etc etc etc… I equip him with my cell phone and send them on their way. Of course the whole time they were gone I’m wondering if I should jump in the car and follow them, but with the help of my hubby I was able maintain my composure (he distracted me by talking about how much we used to do on our own at our sons age and younger). They arrive back home safely about 15 minutes later with everything they were supposed to get and he even presented me with the change. Ahh a sigh of relief. I realized that I really need to let go just a little bit and let these kids blossom, I don’t want my son or my daughter to grow up and not know how to survive on their own or be so spoiled they refuse to do anything for themselves. I know these streets are mean..this is Philadelphia, but I don’t want them to be completely sheltered (although that would hardly be the case.. I am still their mother). My son was so proud that I gave him that itsty bitsy bit of freedom and said to me as he was getting out of the car when I dropped him off to school this morning “See Mom..now you know I can walk to the store on my own”..these simple words were all I needed to hear, he is growing up and I need to allow him to spread his wings and fly!!!